Module 1:

Understanding your Paradigm - A.K.A. Your Limiting Beliefs

 

Understanding your Paradigm A.K.A. Your Limiting Beliefs

What holds you back from having amazing style?

Would you be surprised to learn it probably isn’t your taste in clothing or your favorite color scheme? And it certainly isn’t your budget, since great style is a way of life and not an unreachable expense. It isn’t the shops you regularly visit, as the Internet offers each of us what seems like an endless list of clothing options.

Amazing style is a direct result of how you view the world, or your paradigm. Just like your attitude impacts your ability to live a prosperous life, your view of your life totally impacts the way in which you are perceived by the world.

Your age, gender, race, sexual preference, education, and wealth do not dictate style. They don’t even determine who or what you are. Style is a learned art acquired through a great deal of insight and practice. Like learning to play a sport or excelling in school, style is the result of hard work, effort, and a desire to be the best version of yourself.

Being well-dressed is a discipline. It’s a talent. It’s a lifelong learning process. Knowing how to put yourself together isn’t easy. While some people are more naturally stylish than others, we all still need to put in the hard work to look amazing. And sadly, style isn’t a subject taught in school; and your parents likely didn’t sit down with you to have a talk about fashion. But I am not going to talk about fashion, because fashion is an industry. It’s an industry that is built on generating profit in exchange for the perception of style.. On the other hand, style is an individualistic quest to find who you are and where you belong in this world. It is about being able to see yourself differently and believe in something different about yourself. And this results in a magnificent empowerment of the mind, body, and soul.

Personal style is more than fashion—it is attitude and everything that goes along with it. It’s how you dress, style your hair, decorate your home, behave on a date, choose a gift, treat a friend, drive your car, say “yes” to something, say “no” to something else, do your job, making a living, quit your job, and make every basic choice throughout your day. Everything, and I mean everything, can and should be done with a sense of style. When I say style, I’m not just referring to the latest trends or the most popular designers on the market. Those are merely an expression of your style. I mean your personal style, the style that is uniquely suited to you and everything you think, feel, want and inevitably do. It’s about wanting to express who you are, which starts with your own self-awareness. The more self-awareness you have, the better your style is going to be and the more confident you will feel in the process thereof.

Style has a huge impact on how we feel. When your dressed in something that looks great and garners a lot of compliments, I bet you feel fantastic. You feel as if you can conquer the world. On the other hand, when you do not feel confident a the dress you are wearing, then I bet self-doubt shows up in your actions and interpersonal relationships. It’s amazing how wearing the right outfit can quickly transform your emotions from insecurity and unsureness to feeling powerful and confident. But the best news is that it is extremely easy to control what you wear and how you dress.

The way you dress impacts the way that others perceive you and your capabilities. When all else is equal, the better-dressed person often gets the job or lands the valuable promotion. For example, when it comes to a job search, you can’t change where you worked, or where you went to school. However, you can change how others view you based on how you look and how you sound. Thus, your wardrobe can be a game-changer in both professional and personal matters.

But a lot of women feel lost in their style.

It’s not easy developing into a woman. We are always taught by the fundamental ideals of what we should be throughout our lives: How many times have you heard statements like:

  • “This is what you should wear at your age.”,
  • “This is how you should act like at twenty years of age.”
  • “This is what you should be doing when you are twenty-five.”

The list goes on and on. Others are almost always trying to define us. The fear I hear from women about getting dressed is a fear of being seen, noticed, standing out, fear of not knowing where to start and the fear of not knowing where to start.

And we all know that people are afraid of failure. What if others don’t like me? What if someone snickers at my new hairstyle? If people don’t know what they are doing, and they don’t know what might work best for them, then they could potentially get stuck and remain stagnant. In my experience while working with clients, it seems that people are afraid to wear clothes that properly fit their bodies and their energy.

I’ve worked with a number of women who wear larger sized clothes because they think that the extra cloth is hiding or covering up a few extra pounds. In fact, this couldn’t be farther from the truth! The extra fabric actually adds extra weight, and doesn’t hide anything at all. So then why do we take this self-deprecating steps? Because our paradigm pushes us in the wrong direction. This is your condition, this is your paradigm, your pattern of behavior which is preventing you from an amazing style.

Think about that for a second. What are paradigms that might be holding you back? Paradigms are mental programs that have almost exclusive control over your habitual behavior, and almost all of your behavior is habitual.

Your paradigms create the prism through which you view and make sense of the world around you. When information is presented to your mind, your mind runs through all of the things it already knows about that piece of information. It figures out where it fits in with the bigger picture, and decides if the information is good or bed, desirable or undesirable, possible or not.

Paradigms are formed from a combination of many years of experience that include how you interacted with the world and how the people in the world interacted with you. These lessons are so ingrained in our very DNA that it can be challenging for a person to realize that she is in the middle of a negative paradigm until it is pointed out to them. So what does this have to do with your style?

The same things happens with our choice in clothes. If you have limiting beliefs, you will limit your style as well because you will always end up buying clothes or assemble outfits that will not look good on you or make you feel your best. Many people resist change because it often feels uncomfortable. Let me offer you an example of this I experienced with one of my clients:

She grew up extremely poor and could only afford to purchase clothes at a very inexpensive and cheap secondhand store. She grew up and became a very successful woman who can now buy whatever she wants. So she does. Again and again and again. She buys and buys and buys as if to tell the world, “See I don’t have to shop cheap anymore.”

The problem is her wardrobe suffered, her self-esteem suffered, and she couldn’t find herself. Because she was lost, she couldn’t dress herself and locate her own sense of style. She had everything she wanted but the very thing for which she had dreamed—style. That is because you cannot buy style. You either have it or you don’t. However, she eventually got clear on the fact that she didn’t have to prove anything to anybody.

It was time to let go of her made up story and start a new chapter in her life of style.

For example, the dress she bought and didn’t wear was like a metaphor for every paradigm she had. She spent good money on the dress, but had no use for it. Yet she kept it in her closet. Do you ever find that you have no use for a paradigm you hold onto? I bet you are nodding your head in agreement.

Her limiting belief was that she spent a lot of money on something so she needed to keep it. After all, money doesn’t grow on trees! There was no chance she could find her style until she changed her paradigm to one that supported her and motivated her to buy clothes and keep the clothes she loved to wear

  • The story: I may need them.
  • The limiting belief: I must wear shoes I don’t like.
  • The new belief: I wear shoes I love, even I can only afford two pairs of them.

We can change our paradigms and create ones that serves us.

The impact of personal style goes far beyond making a good first impression; great style is also approaching each day with confidence. In today’s world, looking your best keeps you one step ahead. This module will help you find your happiness, your success, and above all else, your style. You don’t have to sacrifice one for the other. You can have them all, and they can actually support your constant growth and development.
But before getting there you have to do a lot of work because your paradigm, your old conditioning, your limiting beliefs don’t want to let you to change. But when you decide to change, you’ll see a tremendous difference I both your style and your entire life.

Together, we will embark on a journey to show the world you are hot and you are sexy, while showing yourself you are happy and your successful. The world is filled with empowered women…and it is time for you to join the club and be the best version of you that you can be.

And, above all else, you can of course do it with amazing style…

But a lot of women feel lost in their style.

It’s not easy developing into a woman. We are always taught by the fundamental ideals of what we should be throughout our lives: How many times have you heard statements like:

  • “This is what you should wear at your age.”,
  • “This is how you should act like at twenty years of age.”
  • “This is what you should be doing when you are twenty-five.”

The list goes on and on. Others are almost always trying to define us. The fear I hear from women about getting dressed is a fear of being seen, noticed, standing out, fear of not knowing where to start and the fear of not knowing where to start.

And we all know that people are afraid of failure. What if others don’t like me? What if someone snickers at my new hairstyle? If people don’t know what they are doing, and they don’t know what might work best for them, then they could potentially get stuck and remain stagnant. In my experience while working with clients, it seems that people are afraid to wear clothes that properly fit their bodies and their energy.

I’ve worked with a number of women who wear larger sized clothes because they think that the extra cloth is hiding or covering up a few extra pounds. In fact, this couldn’t be farther from the truth! The extra fabric actually adds extra weight, and doesn’t hide anything at all. So then why do we take this self-deprecating steps? Because our paradigm pushes us in the wrong direction. This is your condition, this is your paradigm, your pattern of behavior which is preventing you from an amazing style.

Think about that for a second. What are paradigms that might be holding you back? Paradigms are mental programs that have almost exclusive control over your habitual behavior, and almost all of your behavior is habitual.

Your paradigms create the prism through which you view and make sense of the world around you. When information is presented to your mind, your mind runs through all of the things it already knows about that piece of information. It figures out where it fits in with the bigger picture, and decides if the information is good or bed, desirable or undesirable, possible or not.

Paradigms are formed from a combination of many years of experience that include how you interacted with the world and how the people in the world interacted with you. These lessons are so ingrained in our very DNA that it can be challenging for a person to realize that she is in the middle of a negative paradigm until it is pointed out to them. So what does this have to do with your style?

The same things happens with our choice in clothes. If you have limiting beliefs, you will limit your style as well because you will always end up buying clothes or assemble outfits that will not look good on you or make you feel your best. Many people resist change because it often feels uncomfortable. Let me offer you an example of this I experienced with one of my clients:

She grew up extremely poor and could only afford to purchase clothes at a very inexpensive and cheap secondhand store. She grew up and became a very successful woman who can now buy whatever she wants. So she does. Again and again and again. She buys and buys and buys as if to tell the world, “See I don’t have to shop cheap anymore.”

The problem is her wardrobe suffered, her self-esteem suffered, and she couldn’t find herself. Because she was lost, she couldn’t dress herself and locate her own sense of style. She had everything she wanted but the very thing for which she had dreamed—style. That is because you cannot buy style. You either have it or you don’t. However, she eventually got clear on the fact that she didn’t have to prove anything to anybody.

It was time to let go of her made up story and start a new chapter in her life of style.

For example, the dress she bought and didn’t wear was like a metaphor for every paradigm she had. She spent good money on the dress, but had no use for it. Yet she kept it in her closet. Do you ever find that you have no use for a paradigm you hold onto? I bet you are nodding your head in agreement.

Her limiting belief was that she spent a lot of money on something so she needed to keep it. After all, money doesn’t grow on trees! There was no chance she could find her style until she changed her paradigm to one that supported her and motivated her to buy clothes and keep the clothes she loved to wear

  • The story: I may need them.
  • The limiting belief: I must wear shoes I don’t like.
  • The new belief: I wear shoes I love, even I can only afford two pairs of them.

We can change our paradigms and create ones that serves us.

The impact of personal style goes far beyond making a good first impression; great style is also approaching each day with confidence. In today’s world, looking your best keeps you one step ahead. This module will help you find your happiness, your success, and above all else, your style. You don’t have to sacrifice one for the other. You can have them all, and they can actually support your constant growth and development.

But before getting there you have to do a lot of work because your paradigm, your old conditioning, your limiting beliefs don’t want to let you to change. But when you decide to change, you’ll see a tremendous difference I both your style and your entire life.

Together, we will embark on a journey to show the world you are hot and you are sexy, while showing yourself you are happy and your successful. The world is filled with empowered women…and it is time for you to join the club and be the best version of you that you can be.

And, above all else, you can of course do it with amazing style…

Worksheet  1 – 7 Steps to Freedom